Toi et Moi Engagement Rings: A Pear and Tourmaline, and an Upgrade
By Clint Casmiro, Co-Founder, Smiro Studio · Updated October 22, 2026
Short answer: A toi et moi ring sets two stones side by side, French for you and me. We have built it two ways for clients. One pairs a 2.5 carat pear diamond with a 2.5 carat green tourmaline in an 18K yellow gold cathedral, with the keychain he proposed with enclosed inside the band. The other is an upgrade: a new marquise diamond beside the round diamond from her old engagement ring, with a wedding band that stacks against it.
A toi et moi sets two stones side by side. The pair can be two diamonds, a diamond and a gemstone, or a new stone with an old one. Here are two we made.
Ring 1: a pear diamond and a green tourmaline
Andrew's ring: two 2.5 carat stones, one diamond and one tourmaline.
- Stones
- 2.5 carat pear shaped diamond and a 2.5 carat green tourmaline
- Setting
- 18K yellow gold cathedral, round prongs and a V prong on the point of the pear
- Band
- 2.2 mm euroshank
- Details
- The keychain he proposed with is enclosed inside the band and runs all the way around the interior
Matching the carat weights keeps the two stones balanced, so neither reads as the side stone. The V prong protects the point of the pear. See Andrew's ring.
Ring 2: a new marquise and the round from her first ring
Yeritza's ring and wedding band.
- Stones
- A new marquise diamond and the round diamond from her old engagement ring
- Set
- Toi et moi ring plus a wedding band that stacks with it
A toi et moi is a good way to upgrade without letting go of the first stone. The marquise is the new one, the round is the original, and the band was made to stack with the pair. See Yeritza's ring and band.
How to pick the two stones
- Contrast the shapes. Pear and rectangle, marquise and round. Two different outlines read as a pair.
- Decide the balance. Equal weights (ring 1) feel like two partners. A bigger and a smaller stone (ring 2) feel like a centre and an accent.
- Check the gemstone for daily wear. Tourmaline sits around 7 to 7.5 on the Mohs scale, softer than sapphire at 9 or diamond at 10, so it is worth a protective setting and some care.
For more pairings, see 6 unique ideas from real client rings, which includes another toi et moi, and our sapphire engagement rings if you want colour that is harder wearing.
How to get a toi et moi like these
Tell us the two stones, or the one you already have. If you are reusing a diamond from an old ring, we plan the design around its shape and size. Browse toi et moi rings and three stone and toi et moi for starting points.
Reusing a stone from an old ring? Send photos of it before the call so we can plan around its shape and size. We work over video with couples across Canada and the US.
Want a toi et moi built around your two stones?
A free 20 minute video call with our team. Bring a photo, a budget, or nothing at all.
Book a free callGet a free estimateQuestions we get about this
What does toi et moi mean?
It is French for you and me. A toi et moi ring sets two stones side by side, one for each partner.
Can a toi et moi mix a diamond and a gemstone?
Yes. The first ring on this page pairs a 2.5 carat pear diamond with a 2.5 carat green tourmaline.
Can I use the diamond from my old ring?
Yes. The second ring here sets the round diamond from her old engagement ring beside a new marquise.
Does a wedding band fit next to a toi et moi?
It can if the band is designed with the ring. The second ring was made with a wedding band that stacks against it.
Is tourmaline durable enough for an engagement ring?
It sits around 7 to 7.5 on the Mohs scale, softer than sapphire or diamond. It can be worn every day with a protective setting and some care.
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